The Bottom of the Box

Today is my first day off since I started at the vet school almost 1 month ago. 1 month people! Wow. When did that happen?

I was just reading my brother's newest blog entry called, "Commercial Break," and I was inspired to touch base with everyone myself. He was talking about transitioning to a completely new life and what you decide is worth keeping and bringing into the new and what you decide to leave behind. I know exactly what Jared is talking about. That waiting period when you're anxious to begin, anxious to be established and to have things rolling. You look forward to having some amount of momentum to take up the slack when you're tired. Its like digging a hole.
 "I'm not sure where she's going with this. . . "
 Please, just bear with me. It is like digging a hole. The hardest shovel of dirt is the first. After that point, the earth is inherently destabilized by the disorganization you have created and each consecutive shovel-full is just a little easier to get out of the ground.
"Wow, she really made that work, and also, I like how sciencey it sounded."

When I was moving into the town of Cary, I would look at people walking down the street and feel so jealous of them. I was jealous that they were so comfortable walking down the street. They seemed to know where they were going. They actually had somewhere to go, things to do and they knew how to get there and do them.
Well after a month, I have to say that I still don't walk down the street, . . . but I do drive.
"She's being cheeky."
I have a few typical destinations, the hospital, Starbucks, the Harris Teeter grocery store and occasionally, Mimi's cafe. I'm starting to settle in and as the newness subsides I realize that some of the things I planned on leaving behind me, in that old life, were quietly packed away in the bottom of a box. I'm disappointed to find them there. Disappointed that I still have to deal with them.

"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, all things are made new." -2 Cor 5:17
"And He who sits on the throne said, 'Behold, I am making all things new. . . ." -Rev 21:5

I heard a great sermon today by a man named, Trip Lee. He said that we are created in the image of God and that the work of the Enemy is to defile that image in us.

"Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge ACCORDING TO THE IMAGE OF THE ONE WHO CREATED HIM. . . ." -Col 3:9-10

So I've got work to do. I can't just pick these things up out of the bottom of the box and throw them in the garbage. Its like losing weight.
"Here we go again."
 No it is. When you eat things that are high in simple sugars and fats, you don't exercise and then add to that the stress of life, the universe and everything, you gain weight. The bad kind. The pudgy kind. The decrease in self-confidence kind. Well wouldn't it be nice if you could just say, okay, I don't want to have eaten those things and lazed around and stressed about all that junk and then whatever weight you had gained would just magically disappear? Well anyone other than a stick-insect knows that it simply doesn't work that way. Unfortunately, you have incorporated those things into your very being. They are a part of you and separating yourself from them takes a lot of hard work. Well the same goes for bad habits and sin and from my personal experience, the more often you give in, the harder it is to make the right decision the next time.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" -Phil 4:13

But that means I have to go to Christ. I admit that when I'm faced with the desire to sin, to make a bad choice, when I'm tempted, the last thing I want to do is come to Jesus. My sin nature hates Him and it knows that He will overcome.

My current challenge is coming to Jesus. Pushing through and coming to Jesus. Not calling my friends or family but taking it straight to the source of strength and coming to Jesus.
I had to unpack those boxes and I found something I didn't want to find but God says to me that the next time I move, the next time I reach the bottom of that box, I don't have to find it there.

So I challenge you to go up to your attic or down to your basement, . . .
"Umm, most of us live in California and don't have attics or basements. . . ?"
. . . or your closet.  Find that box and take out the thing that is buried in the bottom. Expose it to the light and come to Jesus with it.

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleans us from all unrighteousness." -1 John 1:9

On a lighter note. . . .
I would like to introduce you to the newest and first male member of the household. . .
This is BULLITT

Bullitt may be the only male in the house, but he doesn't take crap from anyone. Look at that menacing stare.

To read my brother Jared's blog go to: https://beehivechronicles.wordpress.com/2012/07/21/commercial-break/

Do you remember that hymn, On Christ The Solid Rock I stand?
I don't know if that is actually the name or not, but Its the most important line of the song. "On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand. . . "

North Carolina is an ocean state.  I haven't really thought of it that way because I haven't been to the coast yet.  Still, I'm told that if you walk East long enough, you'll pass through the pastures and the forests and swamps and if you manage to avoid stepping on a Copperhead you will eventually walk straight into the Atlantic Ocean.  It will be cool to see that ocean, from the ground.  I've only ever seen it from 30,000 feet above.

Its only been 3 weeks, but I can tell you that the pastures at the beginning of the journey are beautiful. They are green and they are exciting. You walk through them and they are familiar and there is a comfort in their consistency.

Then you hit the forest. Now the forest is dark, but if you are there at the right time, you experience the wonder of the fireflies. They sparkle magically ahead in the dark, . . . and its warm and there are so many sounds that you feel like you have invaded some private sanctuary, but you don't feel bad, you're just happy to be there and to experience it. Still, at a certain hour, the lightning bugs go to bed and the chorus becomes a stillness.

The swamp. . . . its hard to find a positive side to the swamp. The fireflies are there too, but they are harder to enjoy. There are brief moments of beauty, but you are constantly thinking about the Cotton Mouths and the Water Moccasins. You spend your time looking every which way, worried that they will suddenly appear next to you in the water.

Finally, you break out onto the beach and you see the ocean beyond the dunes.  You are full of joy until you realize that with each step you take, the ground shifts beneath your feet. You are walking faster but hardly gaining ground. You start to get tired. You are out of breath. Your feet are burning on the traitorous sand and then. . . you see it, . . . a rock. Was it there before? Did it appear because you were looking for it? Its mostly buried but you can make out its irregular surface and see where the sand is resting in its crevices. With one step, you are on it and then you see that it stretches before you and dives straight into the ocean. You smile. You're going to make it to the ocean after all. With mixed feelings you look back in the direction of your journey and only then do you realize that the rock under your feet rises up and bridges the swamp and its granite surface reflects light into the dark of the forest and it breaks into slabs of blue and green and borders the pastures as a stone wall.

Why is it that we always look for the rock at the very end?
Not this time.
I'm on the edge of the forest and ahead I can smell the swamp.
I'm looking for it now.

"He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay,
And He set my feet upon a rock and made my footsteps firm."
-Psalm 40:2